Friday, February 27, 2009

Wildest Dreams Check-In, Week 8

Today is Day 53 of the Power 90 program.

Gold Stars

No gold stars. It's been a lousy week all around. I've been stressed at work; and mentally exhausted when away from work. I took zinc lozenges and narrowly avoided catching a sore throat earlier this week.

The Awful Truth

Number of Days AWOL From the Nutrition Plan: 4. There was no pleasure in the rebellion against the nutrition plan. Just the nagging anxiety that my previous way of careless, carefree eating has been permanently "ruined." Ruined without a joyful replacement. This sensation is not the same thing as having developed positive "new habits." Which is how my friends have interpreted this situation.

I can tell that there's really no going back to my previous dietary habits. I've been surprised at how ambivalent (and sometimes resentful) I feel about that. I don't feel guilty when I go AWOL from the nutrition plan; just irritated that there's no joy in it.

I've been shocked at the emotions that are being dredged up by this transition. Offhand, I don't recall hearing or reading any accounts that mentioned this particular sensation. Hmmph.

Number of Days AWOL from the Workouts: 0.5. On Day 51, I abruptly stopped halfway through a workout and walked away.

I've been back on track for the last two days; but still feeling strange about all of this.

What's going on with you? How are your Wildest Dreams (of any type, not just fitness/health related) coming along?

19 comments:

Tracy said...

Hey Woman!!

Taking a little break from writing and decided to pop by...

So let me get this straight, you have gone 8 weeks on this diet and exercise plan. 8 weeks of sweating and soreness and eating foods that you are not used to and don't really like for the sake of your health....

(standing ovation) !!!

Don't beat yourself up, the mini-rebellion that your body and mind are taking you through are their ways of telling you its time to slow down and reassess. Before they shut down alltogether.

It's okay to take a break from the routine - and it's okay to allow a few of the things that you enjoyed back into your life - in moderation. I never gave up chocolate - I would be in jail right now for murdering a co-worker!

I think that part of the reason so many BW give up on a healthy lifestyle is that we equate being healthy and good with suffering. Can't have this, gotta always be in pain, etc. I have been on my health plan since Sept of 08 - I have yet to eat anything fat-free, raw and crunchy or tasteless. It is a plan (weight watchers) that I can live with.

I'm not sure if what you are doing is a cleanse or a jump start but you might want to consider something that gives you more flexibility. If you enjoy at least some aspects of your new plan, you will stick with it longer...

You Can Do It!!!

Ok back to the book, I'm working on 2-3 pounds off for Monday's weigh in, and oh did I mention that I am now a man magnet? LOL Come visit the site - Friends always welcome!

Peace!

Lorraine said...

Hey Khadija,

I was inspired to start my own weight/fitness challenge since Feb 1. I slacked off by not working out as long and a trip to the doctor for a pre-op let me know that I need to step it up a notch and that is what I did.

Thanks for the inspriration and helping me realize that I am not alone in my quest for a healthier life and lifestyle. We are all human and entitled to take a break now and then. I am proud that I have worked out everyday except for 2 but did not change the eating habits much. So, again, I stepped it up a notch and won't feel bad when I need a break.

Anything worth having is worth working hard for.

Khadija said...

Greetings, Tracy!

Thanks for the standing ovation (*blush*) and encouragement. I truly appreciate it.

For now, I think I'll just stumble along with the current plan. I feel too mentally tired to think through other ideas at the moment. And, I don't do moderation well. Not at all.

{raised fist salute in admiration of your efforts}
_____________

Greetings, Lorraine!

You said, "Thanks for the inspriration and helping me realize that I am not alone in my quest for a healthier life and lifestyle."

You're welcome! And THANK YOU for your encouragement and support. I truly appreciate it.

{raised fist salute in admiration of your efforts}

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

ActsofFaithBlog said...

I think the payoff is limited after you've transitioned. There's no "joy" in reverting and no "rebellion" in continuing. It just is. I'm making plans and tying up some loose ends. I felt very ambivalent...I feel very ambivalent but there's this vast unknown factor. I won't find out how things play out until I experience them.

Khadija said...

Greetings, Faith!

You said, "I think the payoff is limited after you've transitioned."

That's how this is starting to look to me. On the one hand, there are the benefits of protecting one's physical health, compliments, etc. However, the emotional payoff effect of these things wear off. And where's the increased energy and vitality that I've heard so many accounts mention? Hmmph. I'm tired and sore.

[In fairness, this is partially my own fault because I'm not getting enough sleep. But I don't feel any different physically on those days when I did get enough rest. No noticeable "pep in my step."

I feel like somebody lied. Like lots of somebodies lied about that angle. Hmmph.]

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

foreverloyal said...

After slacking off, I had a really good week this past week. The plan was 1.5 per day six days a week, but on Friday, my body said, "Nuh-uh, no you're not either!" So I did a little light walking Friday and Saturday, and today is my no exercise day.
I've controlled my snacking well too.
I have noticed more energy and my skin looks even better.
I'm working on being more organized in other areas of my life, as I'm in the beginning stages of launching a small business.
If I can waste less time I can make some real progress.
----
A note on moderation in diet treats: I love dessert. I find that if I go out for dessert, I can control it. Bringing home a whole cake however, will find me eating most of it myself.
Maybe you can find a bakery where you can go once a week and just buy cake by the slice, or one specialty brownie. Then wait till you get home to eat it.

Ensayn1 said...

Hey Khadija, you said "[In fairness, this is partially my own fault because I'm not getting enough sleep. But I don't feel any different physically on those days when I did get enough rest. No noticeable "pep in my step."

I feel like somebody lied. Like lots of somebodies lied about that angle. Hmmph.]"

I have been feeling this way myself, felt overly tired this week and workouts weren't as good. But, I am keepin' on keepin' on. We know its about our physical health (our temples) and well being. Like a Bob Marley song goes..."none can save us but ourselves." Just keep it moving, keep it moving. The payoff is self healing.

Khadija said...

Greetings, ForeverLoyal!

{raised fist salute in admiration of your efforts---especially getting ready to launch a small business}

Today is my weekly day "off" from all of this, so I'm trying to clear my head. I'll think about your suggestion. Maybe it'll work for me! Thanks for the feedback.
_________________

Greetings, Victor!

The "where's my increased vitality that so many others have clucked about?" angle ticks me off. I'm already feeling mighty irrational about the whole transition! LOL! This angle is an added irritant.

But, as you said, "We know its about our physical health (our temples) and well being. Like a Bob Marley song goes..."none can save us but ourselves." Just keep it moving, keep it moving. The payoff is self healing."

You're right. I need to try to remain focused on rational thoughts with this situation. And just keep it moving. Thanks for the feedback and encouragement.

{raised fist salute in admiration of your efforts}

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

Ana said...

Khadija:
Just hang in there.You are simply experiencing the necessary birth pangs unto becoming a new healthier person.Rome was not built in a day.Everything you are feeling is part of the journey. I hope you are taken a good Multivitamins and B Complex which is very good for stress.

Chamomile tea at night is very good for winding down after a stressful day at work.Some people even drink it during the day to deal with those stressful moments.(Don't, if you are easy to fall asleep )

My close substitute to Haagen Dazs ice cream (strawberry flavor used to be my favorite) is Edys Fruit Bars All Natural (strawberry) blended with Vanilla Soy milk.

As the body gets used to healthy routines, the cravings will stop. Good luck.

Saludos,
Ana

Khadija said...

Greetings, Ana!

Thank you so much for the encouragement, and for stopping by! You said, "You are simply experiencing the necessary birth pangs unto becoming a new healthier person."

Oh, is that what this burst of semi-craziness is about? Well, that idea puts things in a somewhat different perspective. "Post-partum blues" and all. THANK YOU for pointing this out.

I've been negligent about the multivitamin angle. I'll have to correct that omission on my part. I'll also try the Chamomile tea; and look into the Edys Fruit Bars All Natural (strawberry) blended with Vanilla Soy milk combo. That actually sounds tasty.

Thanks again for the feedback.

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

Aphrodite said...

Hello Khadija,

You are brutally honest. :)

I want to commend you on sticking with it thus far at least when you start back you won't be starting from zero and I do expect for you to restart - as I mean you have come quite far with this. You are almost over the hump, almost on the other side of the mountain.

You can't quit now.

JJ said...

I'm still on track and have lost a size. My weight hasn't decreased much but my muscle mass is noticeably bigger-this was very crucial for me so I'm glad!

I added an Omega 3 supplement made from small fish (anchovy, sardine & mackerel). They don't get big enough to absorb the toxins that are now being warned about in salmon.

My knees were starting to bother me after a workout where I did high rep squats & lunges with heavy weight.

I refocused the next few days on cardio, pilates & yoga which didn't stress my joints.

And I added a glucosamine sulfate, chondritin and MSM supplement approved by my naturopath.

Maybe these knees will stop creaking!

Congrats on pushing through your program Khadija, I viewed some of the P90X workouts and that system is no joke.

Much respect.


JJ

Aphrodite said...

I am growing impatient with my hair. It is to my shoulder bone unstretched and bra strap length when stretched.

My mom and I measured and I have roughly three to four more inches to go before I hit mid back length and I can't wait to get there.

This is the most care I have ever given to my hair in my life. I have gone all natural and old school with my products. Commercial products have been hit or miss or disaster for me.


It seems to me the simpler the better.

I have been using eggs, protein powder and mayonnaise for protein, aloe vera, sea kelp, and honey for moisture, castor oil/olive/coconut/broccoli or shea for shine and now I am wondering why did I ever poo poo homemade in the past because I am consistently getting better results with a cheaper product that is kinder to the environment.


I have been hit or miss with the supplements. I had 3" of growth in one month last year when I was taking them, but I had a bad reaction as a result of not drinking enough water when taking them. They detox the body and if you don't give them water to carry the toxins out - they will come out through the skin.

Khadija said...

Greetings, Aphrodite!

Thank you for your encouragement and support. I truly appreciate it.

You said, "You are brutally honest. :)"

Well, I think it does others a huge disservice to not tell the truth, the whole truth, about these sorts of projects. It serves to demoralize others who are struggling with the same issues. And encourages them to feel as if they're alone.

So I'm "almost over the hump," you say? I hope so. It doesn't feel like it. I just feel tired, sore, and irritable. But Ana's "birth pangs" analogy does put a different spin on this situation. I'll try to "suck it up" mentally, and keep on keepin' on.
______________________

Greetings, JJ!

{raised fist salute in admiration of your efforts}

Thank you for your encouragement and support. I truly appreciate it.

And just to be clear, I'm NOT doing P90x. Yet. I'm doing the "basic" program that comes before P90x, which is called Power 90. I plan to start P90x after I finish the Power 90 program.

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

Khadija said...

Hello there, Aphrodite!

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with natural hair remedies. The information you've shared might help somebody else.

THANK YOU.

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

foreverloyal said...

Congratulations, JJ!

What Ana said about "birthing a new person" rings true to me as well.
I am on this fitness journey with my best friend and we often stop and analyze the ways in which we sometimes, seem to PURPOSELY sabotage ourselves.
We're thinking it's partly out of fear of the unknown. We are USED to looking "sort of good enough" (as you articulated in the "flawless" post).
We are NOT used to operating at "maximum flyness", but we are committed to pushing through.
We intend to GET USED to looking and feeling our best.

--More on the treats in moderation: I tell myself that I am TOO GOOD for supermarket cake/dessert. If I am going to eat dessert, I am going for the BEST. One made with the BEST flour, the HIGHEST QUALITY butter, the FRESHEST eggs.
And then I hide from the kids with a cup of tea and SAVOR every bite. Very satisfying!

Khadija said...

Hello there, ForeverLoyal!

You mentioned "maximum flyness."

I LIKE that thought! *Smile*

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

foreverloyal said...

I think I may be serious about this weightloss thing. I ran out of salad greens (have been meeting my goal of 2 large leafy green salads daily) and actually drove to the grocery store at 6am so that I could have salad today.

I'm proud of me, normally I would say, "Oh well, I guess I have to wait until this weekend when I go grocery shopping!" And happily dig into a big bowl of granola instead.

Wow.

I need to keep this "new me" around.

Khadija said...

Hello there, ForeverLoyal!

YES!YES!YES! {raised fist salute}


Peace, blessings and solidarity.