Saturday, April 11, 2009

Wildest Dreams Checklist: Will You Be Ready For Your Breakthrough Moment When It Arrives?

This essay is contained in my new book. I'm delighted to announce that The Sojourner's Passport site has launched! You can visit it at http://www.sojournerspassport.com/.

Everyone, I can't thank you enough for your ongoing encouragement and support; I truly appreciate it. Your support is what made this possible. And here's a special shout-out to my web designers at Educo Web Design. They're nice people to deal with, and they do outstanding work!

Peace and blessings,
Khadija Nassif

18 comments:

Sister Seeking/Miriam/MaryAnn said...

That's IS totally awesome.

"Are you ready to handle the "hateration" that is sure to come with your breakthrough?"

I'm NEVER going to stop saying
( preaching lol lol)this, but ladies, don't give these haters ANY of your emotional, mental, or spiritual space. Don't give them an OUNCE of authority, creditability, power, anything.

Keeping goings, and may God grant every one the best, and I wish every one success in all their endeavours.

Khadija said...

Hello there, SisterSeeking/Miriam!

Yes, this is totally awesome. Fer sure! LOL! And it's exactly the sort of thing that the Agents of BW's Entrapment DON'T want BW to know about. Who would've thought that a NON-"Blasian," NON-"exotic" BLACK woman could have a real shot at pop stardom in South Korea?

Who knew? Well, nobody would have known if this young lady hadn't stepped out on faith to do what SHE was interested in. [I can just imagine the Acting Black Crew ridiculing her choice to listen to, much less sing, Korean songs.]

Also, I doubt that "Doody" [hat tip to PioneerValleyWoman for that codename! LOL]...err, "P-Diddy"...and whatever other BW-hating Negroes Within the Entertainment Industry would have responded as enthusiastically to Ms. White's singing talent as the South Koreans did.

Yes...we have reached the point where outsiders are often (mostly?) more appreciative of BW than most BM or Black people in general (this includes Ikettes and other confused BW who devalue BW).

Which leads me back to the haters. You said, "I'm NEVER going to stop saying
( preaching lol lol)this, but ladies, don't give these haters ANY of your emotional, mental, or spiritual space. Don't give them an OUNCE of authority, creditability, power, anything."


I agree. The other angle is that I doubt many BW knowingly give haters any space in their lives. The problem is that many of us don't recognize the haters around us as being haters. We think they're confused, or concerned about us. Ummm...NO. If these people are confused or concerned, those emotions are tainted with jealousy and envy.

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

Beverly said...

Hey Khadija! (waving)

It has been so long since I posted on your blog; but I have been reading; but I'm often too tired to post. Your most recent post is so timely. There are so many opportunities out there for folks who can think outside of the box, especially people who are citizens of the western world. The world is wide open for us. There are no limits. To answer your questions:

Yes, my skills are definitely polished and becoming more polished everyday. I actually set down and created a 30 year plan that roughly maps out where I'm going and how I'm going to get there. Everyday, I do something to move me closer to my goals. Everyday I do something to improve my skills. Am I ready for "prime time"? For some of the things I want to do, YES; BUT for other things, no, I'm in the process. Am I ready for the hateration? I don't know. I have recently faced a hater here in France and was taken aback by the situation. So I guess I should say I'm not fully prepared. But can you ever be fully prepared for hate, it often comes from the most unexpected places/people.

JaliliMaster said...

One of the groups she covered is called SNSD(a South Korean all-girl group). A few(about two) of the members didn't seem too pleased that her version was getting so much attention(mind you, one of them is a girl who said Alicia Keyes was 'pretty for a black girl'). Don't let her demeanour in the video fool you that it has all been smooth sailing. I know alot of people will watch this and assume that she had it easy. One has to be proactive and know that there will be roadblocks encountered along the way. She has gotten a lot of support/publicity in S.Korea, but sisters, don't think it will all be easy.

Don't give up at the first sign of strife/hindrance. If Natalie White did, there are so many things she would have missed out on. She didn't listen to any of the detractors that she encountered in S.Korea and surrounded herself with positive folks/those who were actually interested. Do the same!

Khadija said...

Hello there, Beverly!

{excited waving}

You said, "Your most recent post is so timely. There are so many opportunities out there for folks who can think outside of the box, especially people who are citizens of the western world. The world is wide open for us."

Thank you for your kind words about the post. I truly appreciate it.

Yep. As you observed in a comment you made on your blog, those of us in the American middle class have opportunities to escape a lifetime of "indentured servitude to salaried work and debt." We mostly squander these opportunities. That's on us.

You said, "Yes, my skills are definitely polished and becoming more polished everyday. I actually set down and created a 30 year plan that roughly maps out where I'm going and how I'm going to get there. Everyday, I do something to move me closer to my goals. Everyday I do something to improve my skills. Am I ready for "prime time"? For some of the things I want to do, YES; BUT for other things, no, I'm in the process."

30 year plan? Guuurl, I'm scared of you! LOL! {raised fist salute} I'm NOT "ready for prime time" with anything that I want to do. I'm working on it, though. I'm closer to "prime time" with some things than with others. It's a process.

You said, "But can you ever be fully prepared for hate, it often comes from the most unexpected places/people."

I don't think that one can predict in advance the exact source or form of the hateration. But one can be generally prepared by keeping in mind that success brings haters out of the closet and out of the woodwork.
_________________________

Hello there, JaliliMaster!

You mentioned, "One of the groups she covered is called SNSD(a South Korean all-girl group). A few(about two) of the members didn't seem too pleased that her version was getting so much attention(mind you, one of them is a girl who said Alicia Keyes was 'pretty for a black girl')."

Yep, success brings haters out of the closet and out of the woodwork.

You said, "Don't let her demeanour in the video fool you that it has all been smooth sailing. I know alot of people will watch this and assume that she had it easy."

This common Black "hater" assumption of "she must have had it easy" or "she must have had a 'hook up'" pisses me off. What I see from her videos is that Ms. White did a lot of HARD WORK getting herself ready for prime time.

More Blacks need to learn to give each other credit for putting in the long hours, and doing the hard work. I hate to hear BW's hard work and accomplishments dismissed with this "hook up" assumption.

You said, "One has to be proactive and know that there will be roadblocks encountered along the way. She has gotten a lot of support/publicity in S.Korea, but sisters, don't think it will all be easy."

It's never easy. There are always roadblocks. But, with hard work AND savvy, one can go around, under, over, or through the roadblocks.

You said, "Don't give up at the first sign of strife/hindrance. If Natalie White did, there are so many things she would have missed out on. She didn't listen to any of the detractors that she encountered in S.Korea and surrounded herself with positive folks/those who were actually interested. Do the same!"

YES!

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

Enlightened said...

She is gorgeous!

That's so awesome to hear about her success in South Korea. I can't even lie, Khadija: I've heard that out of all the Asian ethnic/racial groups, Koreans are the least tolerant of other racial groups. I hope that's not true, but if it is, even MORE cool points for her.

I love a sista who just makes her dreams happen for herself without getting approval from people around her. You are absolutely right, Khadija: music industry folks would have been lining up to tell her how impossible this would be for her. She just bypassed ALL the "gatekeepers" and did it for herself. Incredible!

Sowelu said...

I have been following natalie on yt for awhile and was so happy for her when she made it on starking.

I am inspired by her and oneday hope to do what shes doing.

Im also inspired by Leslie Benfield
heres an article about her
http://english.seoul.go.kr/today/infocus/interview/1241569_5099.php

a snippet of her on The Beauties' Chatterbox(Korean show)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15uKle6Z1jQ

My skills are not polished yet but im working on them. Some of the things ive been doing is
exercising, writing songs, and studying Korean an hour a day.

Im working on being flawless im just decent right now.

not ready for primetime but preparing for for it.

However am prepared for the hateration. I want to thrive and no one will stand in my way. Besides most of the people doing the hating aren't worth any of my energy or time.

roslynholcomb said...

I think this is relevant, if it's not feel free to not post it. One of the things a writer has to always be ready to do is called an 'elevator pitch.' That is, if you suddenly encountered an editor/agent/etc... in an elevator, you should be able to pitch your book/script in just a few sentences. It's a good idea to do this even if you don't expect to ever meet anyone, because people generally have very limited time to listen to you blather on about your story. If you can't encapsulate your story in a few sentences, then you know you have work to do.

Anyway, there's an excellent blog called Query Shark that is actually run by people in publishing. The great thing is, they dissect actual query letters and give you dos/don'ts for doing a query. queryshark.blogspot.com

Today, queryshark posted a link for a blog that helps you put your elevator pitch together.
http://edittorrent.blogspot.com/2009/04/how-to-put-it-together-into-one-neat.html

I love it because it's almost like a workbook! Great thing is, it's free.

Another resource you might consider is a review blog called Dear Author. Once a week they post the first page of an unpublished manuscript to invite critiques. I think it's a good way to get a feel for how your book will be received and get some pointers on something you might have missed.

http://dearauthor.com/wordpress/2009/04/11/first-page-unnamed-womens-fiction-contemporary/

Oh, and Khadija, I did have a link for making your own trailer. My computer is too old to run it, so I haven't tried this, but I know people who have. I've found free images at this website:http://www.sxc.hu/

I think most are amateurs, but some of the photos are quite good.

http://hubpages.com/hub/Create-Your-Own-Book-Trailer-Free

DeStouet said...

I am very happy to see this woman doing her thang. She beautiful too, and polished.

To answer your question, yes I will be ready when my breakthrough moment arrives.

Lorraine said...

You were right on about imagining the obstructionist black folks giving Natalie a hard time about listening to Korean music. (I listen to R&B from countries around the world). Natalie has already had to check some of "our people" on her Youtube page about the very thing. These fools should know that many of the well known artists here actually coach international acts and lend their voices to their projects too. Here Natalie is following her dream (something they NEVER would do) and all they can do is ridicule her. We don't disappoint do we? Natalie is handling her business. Natalie will be laughing all the way to the bank after she gets those big checks and secures her future. Korean producers spend big money on those who they think will be successful.

An Afro Ukrainian Gaitana http://www.gaitana.com/ has a company in the Urkraine (Lavina Music) pulling out all the stops for her too. Soul is soul in matter what language it is sung and Gaitana has it. I say success is where you find it. These ladies' talents have yielded them tremendous opportunity. Encourage the creativity instead of trying to knock it down because you don't have the courage to do what Natalie did. Haters.

Khadija said...

Hello there, Enlightened!

You said, "She is gorgeous!"Yep, she's definitely "ready to feel 'flawless'"! LOL!

You said, "That's so awesome to hear about her success in South Korea. I can't even lie, Khadija: I've heard that out of all the Asian ethnic/racial groups, Koreans are the least tolerant of other racial groups. I hope that's not true, but if it is, even MORE cool points for her."From what I've seen, Asian cultures are xenophobic (and downright racist) in general. However, there are always exceptions to generalities. And there are always opportunities to be found. We just have to seek out these opportunities.

You said, "I love a sista who just makes her dreams happen for herself without getting approval from people around her. You are absolutely right, Khadija: music industry folks would have been lining up to tell her how impossible this would be for her. She just bypassed ALL the "gatekeepers" and did it for herself. Incredible!"This angle is what makes this so "happy-making" for me. I just looove the fact that she jumped right over ALL the bad-faith gatekeepers' heads!
____________________

Hello there, Sowelu!

Thanks for the info about Ms. Benfield. (Yet another sister that the Agents of BW's Entrapment don't want us to know about.)

You said, "My skills are not polished yet but im working on them. Some of the things ive been doing is exercising, writing songs, and studying Korean an hour a day...Im working on being flawless im just decent right now...not ready for primetime but preparing for for it.

However am prepared for the hateration. I want to thrive and no one will stand in my way. Besides most of the people doing the hating aren't worth any of my energy or time."
YES! {raised fist salute} Onward and forward!
_______________

Hello there, Roslyn!

Any helpful information is TOTALLY relevant to Wildest Dreams posts! That's the whole point of this (for us to share life-enhancing information, as well as updates about our projects).

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS INFORMATION! May God bless you.________________

Hello there, DeStouet!

You said, "I am very happy to see this woman doing her thang. She beautiful too, and polished."I know, isn't her breakthrough just totally delightful to know about?!!

You said, "To answer your question, yes I will be ready when my breakthrough moment arrives."YES! {raised fist salute}
____________________

Hello there, Lorraine!

First of all, THANK YOU for bringing this to my attention!

You said, "You were right on about imagining the obstructionist black folks giving Natalie a hard time about listening to Korean music. (I listen to R&B from countries around the world). Natalie has already had to check some of "our people" on her Youtube page about the very thing. These fools should know that many of the well known artists here actually coach international acts and lend their voices to their projects too."Haters never let reality stand in the way of their hateration. I'm happy she set them straight.

You said, "Here Natalie is following her dream (something they NEVER would do) and all they can do is ridicule her. We don't disappoint do we?""Crabs in a barrel" is practically a sacred tradition with us. Whatever. Onward and forward.

You said, "Natalie is handling her business. Natalie will be laughing all the way to the bank after she gets those big checks and secures her future."And I'll be cheering her on every step of the way. Now that I'm aware of her, I'll try to keep up with her career. And, given the ability to shop internationally online (I love Amazon.com), I'll be sure to support her and buy her future album (when she puts one out).

Peace, blessings and solidarity.

Anonymous said...

@ Miriam you are so right. I have two females neighbors who try to give me a hard time. And, yes sometimes I forget and allow them to get the best of me. They probably think that I have something they do not have. I simply get up and go to work and school. Ladies, if need be continue with your education.

Anonymous said...

What a nice feel good video.

a.f.

JaliliMaster said...

"My skills are not polished yet but im working on them. Some of the things ive been doing is
exercising, writing songs, and studying Korean an hour a day."



That's really good. People don't know that there are alot of resources available if one wants to learn a language(for free or minimal financial cost). I spend a few hours each week learning Russian and Arabic. I'm brushing up on my German as well, as I haven't spoken it in eons. Sistas should try to equip themselves as well as they can so that when thay take the leap, they would have something extra!

JaliliMaster said...

"I am very happy to see this woman doing her thang. She beautiful too, and polished."


Yes, she is rather polished. I'm used to seeing people travelling abroad ad acting a fool. Another thing we should do is try as best as we can to learn about the culture. No one will ever tolerate ignorance. See the way she is acting and speaking(her mannerisms, tone of her voice, diction, volume, etc), these are things that had she done on t.v in America, folks would have said she was too bougie(in a negative way).

And this also ties in with the 'flawless' discussion. This sista didn't know when her breakthrough was going to come. She didn't have the luxury of having an album release date, so being able to prpare in advance. SHE WAS ALREADY FLAWLESS! Be prepared so that when you own time comes, you won't be taken by surprise!

Anonymous said...

@ JaliliMaster,
I totally agree...Preparation, Preparation, Preparation.

One must be prepared.

An Opportunity can knock at any time of the day.

a.f.

ActsofFaithBlog said...

I'm distancing my expectations for approval but when it comes to certain family members I still have to catch myself. I also realize that I must continue to divest my thoughts about wanting to "help someone out" when I need to be focusing on myself exclusively. I love this video and there's another one from a contestant on Britain's Got Talent where this 47 yo has the voice of an angel but is plain looking. She had the audience practically in tears. The woman you featured may not be exotic but she is definitely pretty though and living in San Francisco I can understand being influenced by Korean music because they have a local channel on basic cable. This was great to see though because she's created a niche market for herself which gives her more career opportunities than trying out for say...American Idol.

Khadija said...

Hello there, Faith!

Yes, I saw the video clip of that particular contestant on "Britain's Got Talent." That was truly wonderful; I was so happy for her! {raised fist salute for that woman}

Yes, Ms. White is very pretty (with a "flawless" outer presentation); and she was very shrewd in finding a niche market where she stands out from the rest. We can all learn a lot from her example.

Peace, blessings and solidarity.